Oh So Hot, Right Obama?

Uh Huh

MacBook's New Home

In an attempt to keep things neat and tidy, I always look for ways to eliminate clutter, cords, wall warts, etc. I also like to keep a clean life in general. I like digital paper as opposed to real paper and keep both my home desk and work desk as free of paper as possible. So against actual paper am I, not long after I'd been hired by JNR, one of the other account managers in the office was asked by my currently assigned sales guy to go into my office and see if she couldn't find something pertaining to his program while I was out of the office. After entering my office and pulling all the drawers open only to find lint balls, 3 ball point pens from the last desk inhabitant, and no paperwork in sight, she asked the salesman if I was still an employee because it looked as though my desk had been vacated or cleaned out by management.

This has turned into somewhat of a joke around the office because coworkers mistake an empty desk for nothing to do; they will come into my office during crunch time before a program is about to go live and comment that I actually DO WORK, having seen my desk is cluttered with menus, contracts, entertainment write-ups, band CDs, etc.

So, the other day while working at home on a far smaller desk than my U-shaped 6x8x6 foot monster at work, I had my MacBook open streaming music, my work laptop open and plugged into my 2nd monitor, a third laptop open on the floor that I was rebuilding and no room except for the keyboard tray for paperwork (final billing requires actual paperwork). Giving in to my penchant for procrastination, I set about figuring out how to make things better with the overall goal including the fact that I would soon be rid of my work laptop but still wanting nothing on my home desk except for the pens/pencils, coin jar, and lamp.

For a bargain at $8.29 down at the local hardware store, and about 20 minutes of my time, I devised a safe and secure "iMount" for my MacBook.

First, I mapped out where I wanted the MacBook to reside on the side of my desk. Having already mounted the surge protector to the back edge years ago, this was a simple task. I would just have it butt up against it along the bottom corner. Next, I used a pencil and drew a line around the exposed three sides of the MacBook, using the lip of the top of the desk as my top guide. It's beveled so there would be plenty of room for what I had in mind. Once that was done, I snagged on of the coaxial cable-ready staples from along the wall behind my couch where the TV cable being a little loose isn't noticed and used it to secure the SVGA cable to the side of the desk so that it wouldn't be resting it's weight against the laptop's interface and ultimately damaging it.

Now I went to the hardware store and bought two 2" L brackets, one 1" L bracket, two 1/2" brass flat head screws, one 1/4" brass flat head screw, and some adhesive-backed felt. I took the 2" brackets and bent them at approximately the 1-1/2" mark in my vice (the MacBook is 1.08" thick). It was a little tricky and required some hammering of the brackets on the anvil portion of my vice to get them straight. Once done with that, I took some of the felt and trimmed it to fit the length and depth of the portion that would be exposed to the laptop. Then I screwed them to the side of the desk just below the penciled in guide. Then I took the 1" bracket, applied some felt and screwed it to the bottom of the top of the desk using the 1/4" brass screw since it's tapered and thinner than the side wall of the desk.


With that done, I slid the laptop into the new home, hooked up the SVGA cable to make sure my stolen staple held it at a non-fatiguing angle (I actually had to move it) and then attached the power cord and USB Mac keyboard.



Voila! I have a cleaner desk, I can use the keyboard tray for paperwork (or nothing) and there's room for...well, nothing (or another beer since the one in the picture is nearly empty). Genius.

Rise of the Adolescent

In light of my approaching unemployment, I have begun to weed through the stuff that has been collecting in my office at work and parrying down to what I must pack and take and what can be left behind. I don't pilfer and steal when I leave; quite the contrary. I actually bring most of my essential office/desk stuff from one employ to the next. With all this going on at work I have also begun to clean out my apartment and tidy things up here and there. Oh sure, I could wait until I am actually unemployed and then take care of this sort of thing instead of looking for a job but I'm being proactive and eliminating all distractions, sans one (I'll get to that shortly). So, Old Tom Clancy novels I'll never read again - Goodwill. All my trip staff polo shirts I've been keeping for no good reason - Goodwill (except for one white and one black). All the other random flotsam and jetsam in closets, bookshelves, drawers - Goodwill..or the garbage.

And for those of you who really know me and/or have been to my apartment, you know my humble abode is not cluttered to begin with so what, you may ask, did I actually get rid of? Despite my best efforts to keep things fairly streamlined, I do collect a fair amount of crap. And no I don't count the awesome random things like Polaroid cameras, C-cell batteries from 1946, square nails, etc. That shit's great.

As I am getting rid of things, my sister moved out of LA for the summer and came by to store some items with me. Among those items was her skateboard. she's got an old school (classic) 10+" deck straight-nose, flip tail deck with nice wide wheels and fast bearings. I immediately jumped on it and began to relearn how to skate. Then it hit me that I should use a skateboard as my main means of transportation in and around my neighborhood. So, after a few weeks of riding her board, I went out and got my own. That way I can get comfortable on what I will be riding straightaway. So, I went to the local skate shop and built a board. Good times.



Like most skate shops, they give away stuff when you buy enough, and so the guy threw in a bunch of stickers to decorate my new deck. I actually remember when spending enough warranted a sticker of my choice and being so very happy about it. Stickers were a luxury the last time I had a board. Because I was buying everything, LA Skate allowed me to choose SIX stickers. Imagine my joy.



So in the coming weeks, I shall be continuing my quest to become skate savvy again. If you see me and I'm wearing an arm sling or with asphalt "love" on elbows, knees, shins, etc., you'll know why.

You're Kidding Me, Right?

Canine-Human Bite Guard

Yea, I bet this works real well. It'll be like getting cut with a severely dull knife rather than a sharp one, that's my guess. It actually looks more like Invisalign for dogs than anything else.

The News Sucks

Ok, the news (CNN,HLN, etc.) just sucks and needs an enema.

Exhibit 1 - This picture -

Obama Uses Air France Stairs...Noooooo! This picture was yanked from the AP site, ostensibly because of the blather that would abound from our president using a recently crashed air carrier's stairs. Lame. Way to censor dark comedy...or absolutely nothing, your choice.

Exhibit 2 - CNN reporting on David Carradine's death...and using TMZ as a reliable source. They're not a credible source; they're paparazzi. They're fluff that gets onto Perez Hilton's site, onto the Star, People, Us Weekly, Entertainment, and the likes covers. That's it, CNN. Next thing, you'll be relying on anchors who blather anything but fair and balanced, or a complete (360° even)outlooks on anything. You don't report the news, you compete with FOX News for sensationalism. Americans aren't that dumb but you don't go out of your way to cater to anything but the lowest common genetic denominator. Good job. You have shed all but the last vestiges of your newsworthy self in the race to the bottom. There are virtually zero anchors, reporters, or feature writers on your staff that can compete with the pantheon that has names like Woodward, Bernstein, Brokaw, Rather, Jennings, Cronkite, Karnow, etc.

Exhibit 3 - Again, CNN, HLN, etc....putting a picture-in-picture up during the newscast of the camera trained on the open door of Air Force One as you wait for the president to step off of the damned airplane. Holy fuck! He might walk down the stairs again!!! OMMFG. Are you really expecting a redux of that day Gerald Ford came tumbling down the stairs or is this what constitutes "Breaking News" now?

Focus on the Subject? Nah....

As if anyone needs more proof that sex sells (or is in anyway more alluring than the actual subject matter)

Spider Man and Bikini Girls

Now, don't get me wrong, I think that the camera is correctly focused but the commentary to the right is off.

Internet Nugget

I like this soldier's sentiments.

Bwahahaha

Very nice. Well done, good sir.
Sleeping With the Enemy